The Love Guru
I made a number of boneheaded predictions during 2008—Sweeney Todd winning the Best Picture Oscar? What the hell was I thinking???—but the biggest of all may have been stating in the Summer Movie Preview that ran in the June/July GIANT that Mike Meyers’ new comedy would bank $140 million. In my defense, I had to make that call way back in April, when we had seen any footage of Meyers’ disaster-in-the-making and all I had to go on was the astronomical grosses for his beloved Austin Powers franchise. As soon as the first trailers for Guru started to leak though, I realized I had probably made a big mistake—after all, when a trailer for a comedy doesn’t contain a single laugh, you know something’s wrong. I skipped the movie in theaters after the endless waves of awful reviews, but caught up with it on DVD and was amazed to find it was even worse than I had heard. Despite clocking in at a swift 80 minutes, the movie felt about eight hours long, weighed down by Meyers’ grating performance and the general idiocy of the humor. For once, audiences sided with critics—The Love Guru grossed an embarrassing $32 million during its theatrical run. So in the end, I was only a mere $108 million off in my prediction. Mr. Meyers, if you can send me a check with that amount to my P.O. box by December 25th, we’ll be square. Kthxbye.